Weekend before this past one, or the 14th of October to be specific, my sweet friend Pam married a wonderful man and friend, Ben. I had the joy and true privilege to be in the wedding as a bridesmaid. I will confess here that this was only my third time to be a bridesmaid. And technically you could say this was my first time, since the other two times I was maid-of-honor.
My first wedding was my sisters. I was young, 17 I think. I had no idea what all was required of a maid-of-honor and I am pretty sure I did a crap job since I was most concerned about how cute I was going to look to my then boyfriend during the ceremony. Would he dream of the day he would marry me? How good would he look in a suit? Can I ask the photographer to take a picture of us? Wait, what? I need to straighten the train? Hold the ring? What? Thankfully she did not keep score because she was a wonderful matron-of-honor to me.
The second wedding was my best friend and college roommate, Karen. I was somewhat better at my job. I hosted a shower (with my mom's help and financial contributions). I attended other showers, bought gifts, attempted a toast, cried. I was young though and had little thought about the actual marriage, the vows, the witness I was and the statement I was making standing with them.
This time was so fun and so much more meaningful. I adore Pam, she is a treasured friend. I have known her since she met Ben and always tried my best to be a support to her as she worked to figure out her relationship with him. I was so honored to be in her wedding. Since he was the Director of High School Ministries and she was the Administrative Assistant to Student Ministries at our church, it was kind of like a celebrity wedding. There was so much more meaning to me this time. As a bridesmaid I committed to supporting their marriage, not just on that Saturday, but FOR ALL TIME. Seriously, I will pray for them, love them (unfortunately from afar) and do my best to be there for them.
This experience was such a good reminder to me, and I think Mike, of the commitment we made to each other. This past year has not been easy. There has been sickness and health, we have felt both rich and poor. So many marriages end when a child is diagnosed with special needs. I am too lazy to look up the statistics, but it is high, I know from teaching. Despite all this, I have never been more confident in my love for Mike, his love for me and our dedication to our family. I do think though we have been so focused on being parents that we have lost focus on being husband and wife. I am thankful for the reminder.
So, congratulations to Ben and Pam! And doesn't Mike look good in a suit?